Shop Tom Bihn
1-800-729-9607
emailus@tombihn.com
Tom Bihn Forums: Community discussion on travel bags, laptop bags, and backpacks. Tom Bihn has been designing and making bags since 1972. The best materials and innovative construction.

Page 1 of 2 1 2 LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 16
  1. #1
    Forum Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2013
    Location
    Atlanta, GA
    Posts
    153

    Books of Encouragement

    Hey all-

    I know this is a place we come to discuss our love for bags and their assorted uses. So, I hope my sort of off topic question isn’t seen as too much of a bummer.

    A few years ago my Father was diagnosed with a rare immune system disorder and shortly after that my Mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. Over the last six years I served as their caregiver and don’t regret my decision at all. My Father passed about five years ago and my Mother passed away last week. So, I’m trying to move on and doing “ok” but realize I could use some additional assistance.

    So, does anyone have any recommendations for books that I might read? They could be specifically related to the subject or maybe just something you have found to be an encouragement in your life. Also, while I consider myself a Christian recommendations do not need to be of one particular belief system or of any formal belief system at all.

    Anyway, thanks for allowing me to share.

  2. #2
    Forum Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2015
    Location
    Oklahoma
    Posts
    101
    Sorry to hear about your mother and I imagine the past few years have been difficult. I'll give this some thought and if I come up with any book titles, I'll let you know. This may sound strange, but sometimes, I see myself reacting to a situation or something that occurs in every day life and I think "that's how my father would have handled it" or "my mother would have done it this way" and I find comfort in that. I would often confer with my mother about baking, cooking, sewing questions, etc. -- until she got much older and those are the times I miss.

  3. #3
    Forum Member BajaMandy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2015
    Location
    WNC
    Posts
    35
    "When Things Fall Apart" by Pema Chodron (an American Buddhist Nun)
    Black Dyneema/Wasabi SA (with UMP & LMP and GloWire), Cocoa/Wasabi Imago, Olive/Wasabi MCB, Verde/UV Swift, Black Dyneema/Island A30, Black Dyneema/Iberian Co-Pilot, PCSB in Wasabi, SSB's in Black & Wasabi, LSB's in Zest & NW Sky, TT's in Steel & Wasabi, Various Packing Cubes, TSS's, YSS's, OP's, and QKITs

  4. #4
    TOM BIHN Crew (we work here) Darcy's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Location
    The far west
    Posts
    5,016
    I'm glad that you started this thread, BarryLee. I have a feeling the recommendations shared here will be a comfort and a resource to many and beyond those who post in this thread. I'm sorry about your mom: my thoughts are with you.

    I second BajaMandy's recommendation. Also:

    The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
    Recollections: An Autobiography by Viktor Frankl
    (Of note: Frankl had an opportunity to leave Austria before being sent to a concentration camp but chose instead to stay and care for his parents. It may or may not be the right time to read Frankl's story; ultimately I find it to be a very hopeful and inspiring story.)
    Full Catastrophe Living by Jon Kabat-Zinn
    Last edited by Darcy; 08-08-2015 at 08:43 PM.
    Current Carry: Skookum Dog Citizen Canine, Founder's Briefcase, Synapse 19 (day hikes), Guide's Pack (longer day hikes), Yeoman Duffel (winter/emergency stuff for the car), Aeronaut 30 (travel), Night Flight Travel Duffel (camera bag), Moveable Feast + Shop Bags (food)

  5. #5
    Forum Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2015
    Posts
    180
    I can't get a hot link to go in, but here's the link to "I can't stop crying" by Frank Ferris - it was very helpful when my parents died:
    I Can't Stop Crying by Frank D. Ferris, John D. Martin | PenguinRandomHouse.com

    I'm so sorry for your loss - please also seek grief counseling if you can; your local hospice should be able to get you help, even if your mom didn't use hospice. No matter how much it's expected, it's never expected. And no matter how much you are glad she is now whole again, you will still feel bereft. Reading on your own and grief counseling will both help.

  6. #6
    Volunteer Moderator Ilkyway's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2014
    Location
    GMT +1 Germany, North
    Posts
    2,332
    I am so sorry for your losses and I think (without any experiances myself) that taking care for ones perants and letting them go must be among the hardest things to do. They always where there and as children we think of them as al mighty and than it all turns and now they are gone.
    I have read Victor Frankle too and it is a wonderfull book. I have no book recomandation on my own but I wanted to point you to journaling as a means to pull myself out of the darker holes that life sometimes provide. This YouTube amongst others where very helpfull to get me started and I therefor wanted to chare this here. Hope you find your footing back soon.
    5 Reasons to do the Morning Pages - YouTube

    Ilkyway
    “Ankh-Morpork people considered that spelling was a sort of optional extra. They believed in it in the same way they believed in punctuation; it didn't matter where you put it so long as it was there.”

    By Sir Terence David John Pratchett from The Truth

  7. #7
    Forum Member Pokilani's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2014
    Location
    Wisconsin
    Posts
    1,661
    Hi BarryLee. I don't have any book recommendations (though I second anything by John Kabat-Zinn), but wanted to offer my condolences. I'm sure your parents were so grateful to have your support. It's such a challenging circumstance and good that you recognize that you need to look out for yourself.


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
    "Exhaust the little moment.
    Soon it dies.
    And be it gash or gold it will not come
    Again in this identical disguise."
    -Gwendolyn Brooks

  8. #8
    Forum Member marytattoo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2015
    Posts
    1,488
    Quote Originally Posted by Ilkyway View Post
    I am so sorry for your losses and I think (without any experiances myself) that taking care for ones perants and letting them go must be among the hardest things to do. They always where there and as children we think of them as al mighty and than it all turns and now they are gone.
    I have read Victor Frankle too and it is a wonderfull book. I have no book recomandation on my own but I wanted to point you to journaling as a means to pull myself out of the darker holes that life sometimes provide. This YouTube amongst others where very helpfull to get me started and I therefor wanted to chare this here. Hope you find your footing back soon.
    5 Reasons to do the Morning Pages - YouTube

    Ilkyway
    Tagging on to writing. And the book mentioned here, The Artists Way, is excellent and readable.

    Sent from my SM-N910V using Tapatalk

  9. #9
    Forum Member marytattoo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2015
    Posts
    1,488
    There is a book which might speak to a broad audience here. The title is Hiking Through by Paul V Stutzman. He is from Holmes County, Ohio, which is near me. It is Amish country but he isn't Amish. His wife died, and in order to deal with his grief he hiked the Appalachian Trail.

    Sent from my SM-N910V using Tapatalk

  10. #10
    Forum Member
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Posts
    742
    I salute @BarryLee and all others who choose to look after their parents and/or other family members in need of care.

    Long time ago, a friend gave me a tiny book entitled, "This, Too, Shall Pass." I lent the book and have not seen it since. That was over 30 years ago.

    I do not remember the author and the only line I remember from the book is its title. But, "this, too, shall pass" has been my mantra from time to time. It helped me to allow grief to visit and to let it pass.

    CS Lewis' A Grief Observed and Problem of Pain are interesting. The latter is the intellectual exercise of a Magdalen College Don; the former, the lament of a man in grief and pain.

  11. #11
    I work here at TOM BIHN
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Location
    Upper left hand corner of the U.S. map (lower 48 states)
    Posts
    244
    I had a lossy year myself, parting with my mom, my dad and my finest friend Riley, all within 12 months. So I could say I relate, but ultimately it seems we all experience these things so uniquely, I'm not really sure. Nonetheless, my heart goes out to you, my brave friend.

    I find the works of Rumi and Gibran often comforting, even when I don't understand them. But the Bengali poet Rabindranath Tagore is my favorite. His book "Gitanjali" is so sweet:

    I thought that my voyage had come to its end
    at the last limit of my power,---that the path before me was closed,
    that provisions were exhausted
    and the time come to take shelter in a silent obscurity.

    But I find that thy will knows no end in me.
    And when old words die out on the tongue,
    new melodies break forth from the heart;
    and where the old tracks are lost,
    new country is revealed with its wonders.

    Gitanjali: Rabindranath Tagore: 9781619492080: Amazon.com: Books
    Last edited by Tom Bihn; 08-14-2015 at 11:35 AM. Reason: spelling!

  12. #12
    Forum Member marytattoo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2015
    Posts
    1,488
    Quote Originally Posted by Tom Bihn View Post
    I had a lossy year myself, parting with my mom, my dad and my finest friend Riley, all within 12 months. So I could say I relate, but ultimately it seems we all experience these things so uniquely, I'm not really sure. Nonetheless, my heart goes out to you, my brave friend.

    I find the works of Rumi and Gibran often comforting, even when I don't understand them. But the Bengali poet Rabindranath Tagore is my favorite. His book "Gitanjali" is so sweet:

    I thought that my voyage had come to its end
    at the last limit of my power,---that the path before me was closed,
    that provisions were exhausted
    and the time come to take shelter in a silent obscurity.

    But I find that thy will knows no end in me.
    And when old words die out on the tongue,
    new melodies break forth from the heart;
    and where the old tracks are lost,
    new country is revealed with its wonders.

    Gitanjali: Rabindranath Tagore: 9781619492080: Amazon.com: Books
    Thank you for the book link, Tom. I've only read snippets of Tagore when quoted in other books. I just ordered this one. While I do most reading on an ereader, when it comes to poetry or other "deep stuff" I usually order a hard copy. I also love Rumi. And Hafiz. And another good one is the Tao Te Ching. I prefer Stephen Mitchell's translation.

  13. #13
    Forum Member Moose's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Location
    Downeast Maine
    Posts
    1,022
    BarryLee,
    I don't have any books for you. I just wanted to say I'm sorry you have to go through the loss of your mom. My mother died about three weeks ago, I know this is not an easy time. I too took care of my father prior to his passing many years ago. Those were challenging days.
    Be kind to yourself.
    Moose
    List exceeds allowed characters. So I'll just say I'm plum and kiwi loving FOT!

  14. #14
    Forum Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2013
    Location
    VA
    Posts
    615
    BarryLee, I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I don't have a book in particular to recommend, but I often re-read fiction that I have loved, as it can be like a visit with an old friend you know well, and escapism can be helpful sometimes too. I wish you peace at this hard time.

  15. #15
    Forum Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2013
    Location
    Atlanta, GA
    Posts
    153
    I want to thank everyone for the kind words and the great recommendations.

    A friend had recommended The Artist Way a few months back and I actually bought a copy, but never started the book. Now, with a few more recommendation it seems time to give this one a shot.

    I’ve also been considering reading The Little Prince and just never got around to it, but again seems like a good time to read this book.

    I think I will also get a copy of the book Gitanjali as the cited poem seems very encouraging.

    Obviously there are a lot of other great recommendations which I may read in the coming months.

    Thanks All -

Page 1 of 2 1 2 LastLast

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •