Request: Larabar intervention

[jonjake]

One of my weaknesses is rushing to order items that sound interesting when I read strangers gushing about them on the web. Close friends rave about things and I say sure, whatever. But strangers? I bite every time.

And so it was that I ordered a sampler box of Larabars based on the longish thread here on these all-natural energy bars. Apple pie, cherry pie, and pecan pie.

Then I ordered another couple of boxes of the cherry and apple pie, and also a box of the cocoa mole, and then another box of the cocoa mole.

So what I am asking you people to do here is tell me your stories of how Larabars gave you a fat ass, or love handles like Louie Anderson's, or a big dewlappy double chin. Seriously, I need to read some Larabar hate, NOW, or else I'm going to keep eating 5 of these @#$ things a day until they have to cut away a wall of my house to get me out.

Enough with the "ooooo, the lemon bar is to die for!" and "pistachio changed my life!" -- give me the cautionary tales, and give them to me full force, people. Please. I beg you.

[wildgeese]

All I can say is

you shoulda got the cashew kind...

[PM4HIRE]

I suggest you quickly enter a 12 step program with
a strong track record of success.

Click http://www.bettyfordcenter.org/ to learn more.

[aiethabell]

Alas, I believe there is no hope for you.

Have you tried Jocalat bars? Oh, they're really Larabars, too... with chocolate... oh, heelll...p, now I've done it!

I don't even LIKE cashews or walnuts, and I eat Larabars with them. I am, right now, thinking I don't have time for lunch and there IS NO LARABAR in my Swift! I want to hop on the SLU* and go to Whole Foods RIGHT NOW.

About the only help I can give you is:

Go back to bars with all the cr*p in them. (Not much chance of that - Larabars taste like real food, 'cause they are, which is why we love them so.)
Avoid the stores which sell them.
Avoid the websites which sell them.
Avoid giving your correct shipping address out so they don't arrive.
Avoid even thinking about the dang things... *growl* (my stomach is empty, so empty, must have Larabar...)

Oh, dear, I'm not much help, am I???

[Darcy]

This is one of the funniest things I've ever read. Maybe someone makes an ankle-bracelet device that monitors your date intake?

[Zephyrnoid]

Glad I caught this one.
I must be the poor sucker that discovered Lara Bars three years ago. I used them heavily in a study that we did for this project...
http://www.imagometrics.com/GoBags/GoBaghome.htm
In my research of 'energy bars' Lara Bar came out on top for a number of reasons. The most conspicuous were low sodium and vegan diet compliance.
I never became addicted to them because I do not snack on them nor do I advocate that others do either. I use them as fast, on the go semi-replacement meals providing everything I need in a meal, minus protein.
I'm also careful to chase them with lots of water .
Used as such- they will never make you put on weight.
Any food that is used between meals will add to your calorie intake.
I do count calories that I consume against those that I actually burn !!
No fun eh?
Pistachio is arch enemy No.1 as it's PACKED with fat calories. I only eat one a year on my Birthday of those suckers.

[AVService]

you shoulda got the cashew kind...

Funny,these are the ones that I like the best?

I can stop anytime though

However I do not plan to!

Ed

[jonjake]

I'm not seeing any Larabar hate here, people. Give me some hate. I need hate for these delicious, nutritious, inexpensive, convenient little [email protected]%#$ $^$%#%# #^%#%# &#^#%## *#^#^# #

One thing I will give these Larabars -- they do fill you up. Most energy bars, even the craptastic Powerbars, still leave me hungry afterward. But the Larabars, small and quick to eat though they may be, really feel like a meal in your belly. It's the only thing that keeps me from doubling down every time I pass by the open box of bars in the kitchen.

I went the whole day yesterday without eating any. Okay, I ate one. But for me, especially lately, that's basically not eating any.

You people are no help.

[Alicia]

I think the lemon ones taste like eating Pledge.

Is that hateful enough for you?

[jonjake]

Well, I'm not a fan of the lemon either, but I wouldn't go so far as to compare it to Pledge. It's okay, just not as tasty as the other flavors I've tried like cherry/apple/pecan pies, pistachio, and especially the cocoa mole. Actually that's the one I need to hear some real, serious hate about, as soon as humanly possible.

[MikeL]

As of this weekend and because of this thread I'm brand new to Larabars. Oh how I hate you guys.

I've seen the pictures of TB bags with a Larabar in it. I've see the occasional reference to them; but I'd always assumed they were some Euro/Snack/Import as I'd never seen them at my Whole Foods.

That was my 1st mistake. I never walked down the aisle that they were in because I wasn't in the market for the products in that section.
So, yesterday while shopping (and picking up a mushroom and gorgonzola pizza pie from the hot food section - yummy) I decided to go on a Larabars quest. Sure enough they were in the aisle that, I never go down.

My 2nd mistake was getting several flavors. I picked up 10 in all. Yesterday my wife, daughter and I split a Cherry Pie.
To quote my daughter, "what is this?" she said with the same scowl that most college students show when they really don't want to try something new. Then, with her mouth full of a third of the Larabar, she said, "Dad, this is ungodly delicious!"

After showing her the wrapper, and explaining why I picked them up, she proclaimed that she would have to pick up a box of Cherry Pie.

All I can think of right now is which one to have on the way to work tomorrow morning. These things are [sick] they're so good.

My Supper Ego’s going to have to have one or two in them for those days I can’t get lunch because I’m on the move.

[AVService]

I just want to know what could drive an otherwise normal/sane Bihn patron to eat or taste Pledge?!?

[jonjake]

We're adults who spend time on a message board about BAGS. That's what.

[Alicia]

I just want to know what could drive an otherwise normal/sane Bihn patron to eat or taste Pledge?!?

Not so much the eating it, but the smell from it when it is sprayed and the fumes go up your nose. You can kinda "taste" it then.

Sorry to say I haven't had the cocomole, so I can't hate on it.

[AVService]

We're adults who spend time on a message board about BAGS. That's what.

Good Point.
I always overlook the obvious.